Hi there everyone,
My apologize for the longest hiatus ever.
i'm not busy, i'm not occupied with anything, nothing, TOTALLY nothing.
What I've been doing lately then?
Well, I travel back and forth, tweaking my mind, thinking deep, WHAT'S NEXT?
Received a job offer from a company that i really want, REJECTED it.
Why? Because i still believe in that DEGREE i was waiting for.
Yes, I'm 23 this year. so, this is chapter 23 of my blog, and of my life. If you're a follower of this damn blog, you'll know what's first on my wishlist, a DEGREE.
Tomorrow, I'm leaving Penang once again. Just like what i did 4 years ago. A young girl with big dreams, stepping into Sunway University, hoping to cope among the best of education. Did i get it? Yes. Did i enjoy my college life? Definitely, Yes. Did i excel in studies, Hell yeah! Graduated class of 2008, together with Ellyshia, Melita, Su Weng, Raymond and Vishminna. Yes, only us left. we started as 14 in the class. just us left.
Gosh, how i miss Aaron and Azuan's lame joke. How i miss them floitering around with me in Subang. How i miss playing poker and pool with them. How i miss skipping class with them, and hanging out at Orange. How i miss competing in classes. how i miss being the most outstanding student in class. how i miss walking in the college and people looking at me as if i'm a freak. damn, i miss everything about college. i miss that title.
Will be a new life for me. a brand new life. i will gasp every single breath i have, with courage and with all i had to bet, to that title, once again, STUDENT. This time, it's sweeter than ever. I am nobody's burden. I'm on my own. For bad or worst, it's on me now. My decision all the way. They don't know how much this mean for me. even if i have to really suffer this 2 years of education, i will go through it, with whatever is left with me.
I've pack my bags. Settle up my documents. Got myself a job. Enrolled in February intake. Applied for scholarships. I'm fully confident that i'm almost done right here. ALMOST. i just need a proper place to stay. so far, i'm staying kinda far from college. a friend's place. an old mate. Emi. remember her?
Besides all that,
Family are getting better. Mom got herself a new civic as a birthday present from dad. it shows that their relationship is getting better. well, i better keep praying for their happiness. they deserve each other, despites whatever shit that happens to our family. Our family business are also expanding. mom open a new branch of her shop. Dad got promoted as the CEO. brothers are all fine.
I broke up with Jack. Why? I don't think i want to reveal it here. let me just say, he's a nice person, but he's not ambitious enough for me. he just wants to settle for average. you guys of all people knows it well that i'm not average. oh yes, i believe in myself. i am EXTRAORDINARY.
The truth is,
when i was with Jack, i suffered for the last few months of our relationship. Now, I'm with someone better. Someone who deserves me more than anyone else. someone that i failed to see at first. Someone, who started as a friend. For now, he wants to remains anonymous. he wants us to ride low. I respect that decision. so for now, my mouth is sealed.
Everything is falling into places now. things seems to be better, or wonderful, may i say. i've come this far, and, i'm not looking back. for now, i have a new plan in life. my new plan in life is to live for today, and not to worry bout tomorrow. there's always a way out. don't worry too much, dont structure yourself too hard, dont pressure your soul too bad. you deserve to sit back and enjoy this life. trust me, things will fall into places, by itself. dont try to fix anything that is not broken.
can i finish this studies with honour? can i cope to work and support myself without my parents help? can i cope with studies? can i get used to the new environment? can i survive this new relationship with that special someone? will i actually be with him forever? will i be an ART DIRECTOR as i've always wish since i was a little girl? will i be as successful as my babes in future? will i sit in the same table as future doctor, future lawyer, future pharmaceutic, future accountant and future remizer in 5 years time? The answer is, NO. NO for, WHO THE HECK KNOWS? sit back and enjoy the ride god crafted for you.
Dont worry too much.
I've made a wrong turn once or twice.
This is my life.
Still standing, with pride,