1 week of madness!

Time: 6.16 a.m.
Venue: My Kitchen
Mood: Happy
Condition: Worried
Currently: Listening to Sayang Sayang, sang by Alif Aziz...

Endy,
Again, for i dont know how many times, i have to apologize to you.... i'm really sorry Endy... sorry for abandoning this blog... i lost interest in lots of thing nowadays... maybe because i was too busy with my brand new life with him... well, life still goes on as usual, but i have to add an extra slot for him... i want to spend quality time with him...

so, it's like almost a week i didnt write to you right??? the last time was the time i declare to you that i'm taken... well, today is thursday... i dont have class later but still going to college to finish up my video assignment... i still need to shoot video... me and Melita are doing ghost movie titled Dare Not. well, her part is done... now left mine... i have to design SCT flag for our Sports Carnival too... i'm done with the players' list.... FINALLY! that Yong is useless... bugging me with the list.... so, today i'm gonna go to college, grab some food, meet Corrine for my Video Camera form, then go to lab to do some research on the flag design.... next, i'm gonna meet Victor for the flag design.... Melita and Raymond may tag along... we have to finish it by today... if not, Victor is gonna kill me! hehe... and i really have to finish up my video today... tomorrow is the last submission date!

i skipped lots of class nowadays... i'm fucking up my 3D classes mostly... i hate 3D... but Mr. Asmadi s trying his best to help me, since i skip lots of class.... dont worry Sir.... i'm smart... i could catch up... i'll prove it in my assignment! hahahaha... lansi!! oh well, speaking of 3D, reminds me of the lab work that i have to pass up... by Friday! hahah... damn stress!! today is really gonna be a busy day for me! i'm suppose to go to Bukit Jalil but i cancelled it... because my workload is just too much! i'm sorry dear! i know i already promise you... but i just cant... works comes first...

Endy,
since i havent write to you for almost a week, let me briefly update what i've been doing for the last 6 days... well, last Friday, i went to Mr. Asmadi's class, fool around with the 3D Max Studio and i skipped Mr. Tee's class.... i hate programming... seriously... but dont worry Endy... i got the notes from SuWeng.... hehehe.... thanks SuWeng... you're such an angel.. you're always an angel...

on Saturday i attend that stupid 4 hours Oracle class... phew... it was seriously boring... come on Sir... we do have basic in MySQL... so, basic Oracle shouldnt be a problem for us! after that killing class, i went Pyramid to get a new bag... and yes, i finally bought a bag... remember i promise myself that i'm gonna keep my saving for something else??? yes, i really manage to spend a little money for my bag... i'm so happy for myself... i actually liked few bag.... but i finally bought this huge black shiny Nike bag... i'm in love with it... i'm proud of myself! then i get some other stuff like my sandal, nose-ring and etc. then, Matthew finally arrived! we plan to go to Bukit Jalil together.... so, from Pyramid we hoop on a bus to KTM Subang Jaya and took the train to Bandar Tasik Selatan station... then... blablabla... we change 3 train in order to get there.... trust me, it was fun! Matthew is so not used of taking train! he's so spoilt! we stayed there until Sunday... we have so much fun! we dont really go anywhere... but hanging out with crazy people are really fun... Sunday night, Nick came with his last minute assignment... he asked me to help him, due to my bombastic english vocab (according to him).

we went back quite late.. around 4 something... i overslept for Mr. Johnny's class... shit man!! but i went for Mr. Ken's class... well, i love Mr. Ken's class.... he's good... and one thing bout him is he love photography too... he's concern bout his student... especially me... haha... sorry Sir... i skipped too much class... but i'll manage it... dont worry... on Tuesday i skipped his class, but this time with his permission... i went to Bukit Jalil... because we're going to Myanmar Festival in Inti Nilai... phew... speaking of the festival... i have too much fun there!! seriously... well, the party was not that great... i mean, compared to all of the party i've been too.... but this one is special in the sense that it's full of Myanmar student studying in Sunway College, Inti, APIIT and etc.... we have water fight for hours at the party... and you know what... i'm the victim for the guys... i dont know why! maybe because i'm tough to defeat... hahahaha... too bad guys... you're messing with the wrong girl...

Mido and me agreed to be single on that night... hehehe... at first we're single... but when the party is ending, we're sitting together and all.. people start staring at us... and again, we become the water victim... come one guys... dont envy us! we're newly coupled! hahaha... i am so proud when he intro me as his girl... yes dear, i do... i do appreciate it... makes me feel special... well, guys... one thing i have to confess for sure.... Myanmar chick are hot!!! especially when they're wet!! haahhaha.... the party finish around 12.... but we came back to Bukit Jalil around 4 something... me and Mido was really tired, cold and hungry by then... we went to Ja's place to grab my stuff and 7-eleven for cigarette then went straight home... i fell asleep when Mido is bathing... hahah... thats shows that i'm really tired.... honey, thanks for the food and coffee (even though you put cinnamon in it)... i love your cooking! hehehe.......

i came back from Bukit Jalil around 11 and again, i skipped my programming class... nevermind... i'll catch up... i sleep until 2.30 p.m. then, i went to Mr. Asmadi's class... i was late because i was discussing bout the namelist with that bugger, Yong! Mr. Asmadi is being such an angel, teaching me personally on how to draw the plane.... hehehe.. thanks Sir... after class, again, i took a nap... or does it considered as nap?? i slept at 5 something and woke up at 7 something... phew... i sleep a lot!! i'm just tired! too much activity for this week... then, i went to Bidara with my roommate... we ate dinner there... next, i head to AC... phew... i love AC so much!!! hahaha... there, Nick, Mido and Matthew is already waiting for me... they were playing already... damn... hahaha... Ja couldnt make it since he had some problem... well... i miss him!! my greatest big bro ever! 7-inches!(his nickname)... hahahah.... we played pool for few hours... then i went down to Starbucks with my dear... he needs coffee... haha.. you coffee addict! after coffee, again, i ate dinner... hahaha... i ate dry curry mee... damn nice! it's my fav. food in AC! next, we went up again... play pool while watching ManU vs. Barcelona... comments??? sucks!! the game sucks!! hahaa... ok-ok.. i better shut up now....

so, what's next?? haha... i came back around 5 just now... get a quick shower... and here i am now... typing to you! hahahaha...

Endy,
i felt happy... i finally felt happy... i'm happy because i know i'm not in love with him anymore.... the feeling are gone.... thank god... now... i learn from my mistake... dont depend on others too much... hurm... i have no comment when it comes to relationship... but i'll try to play it save... i dont want to get hurt once again Endy... not anymore... i'll always be careful... and honey... one thing for sure... i adore u.... thanks for everything....

Endy,
i wanna chat now.. i'll continue next time... hopefully i wont take that long to write anymore... hehehe.... bye Endy... i love you the most!

Truth,
Tasha

I'm Taken!

Time: 3.06 a.m.
Venue: IndahVilla Condo
Mood: Happy
Condition: Kinda worn-out
Currently: Missing him...

Endy,
hi there, buddy... do you know how much i miss you!!!? well, sorry for not writing... i'm really busy this week... not busy with college... instead, i was busy fooling around... hahaha... i skipped 3 days of class... Mr. Ken, my Video Production lecturer wanted to see me... well, i know what he wants.... he want to lecture me on the video techniques... yeah, he's a great lecturer... Mr. Magen, my Oracle lecturer sucks to the max... it's already week 3 and he's still teaching MYSQL command... hurm... i dont regret of skipping that class...

ok, i dont want to talk bout studies... really lost interest in studies for this week... dont worry, i'll be just fine... i'll develop my interest back... i'll go to class tomorrow... so, what did i do for this week??? well, this is the thing that i really wanna share with you... well, you deserve to know this... you've been with me with whatever condition... so, i know you really deserve this important news... i went to Bukit Jalil(BJ) last Saturday... hang-out at one of my bro's place, Ja. we meet in BB on Saturday and i followed them home after smoking shisha in BB... BJ was fun with them... even though that place is kinda dead, spending time with them is seriously fun... hurm... we went to KLCC on Sunday and have lots of fun... i felt like i got back my life... no more fake friends... i mean, for now... we dont know people, right??? on Monday, we went to Berjaya Times Square with few peeps for movie... we watched Street King... for me, that movie is quite slow... hahaha... so it's kinda boring... Tuesday we went to Asia Cafe and i'm finally home! i went to programming class the next morning with a sleepy head!!! hahaha....

hurm... that's the synopsis of this week's activity... the news that i wanna tell you is about my relationship... well, this is kinda shocking news for my girls... but i dont know how this happen... it happens just like that... i'm now officially taken by someone from Bukit Jalil on Tuesday morning... well, i knew him since last year when he was studying in Sunway... but we got hooked back by my bro, Ja. we became closer and i feel that i like his attitude and thinking... so, here i am, being his official girlfriend... kinda happy now... but to be frank, i'm not sure about this relationship... i'm just scared to put too much hopes due to what had happen to me... but what i know is... i really like him... love?? i dont know... there should be some inside my heart.... the conclusion is... i like the way he treated me... and the best thing bout him is he accepted me for who i am... even though he knew that i'm crazy... hahaha....

Endy, i cant talk much now even though i have so much to tell you... i have to sleep... i have 10.30 class later on and i'm seriously tired now... i just came back from Pyramid... i met him just now with Nicholas and Matthew... i'll catch up with you next time... love you, pal... take care... bye...

i hope this is for real,
Tasha

Heineken presents Tiesto 02 Days of Freedom @ Admiral Marina, Port Dickson, 9 & 10 May

Time: 19.10
Venue: My house
Mood: Kinda sad
Condition: ......
Currently: Listening to Total Eclipse of The Heart, sang by Westlife

Endy,
Frankly speaking, i started missing him.... i dont know why i started developing this strange feeling. i was ok for a few months... now... i'm seriously weak... yeah, i look as if i'm fine and feel fine too... but i knew my self very well... i knew that deep inside me, i'm actually aching...

maybe because right now i feel like i dont have friends anymore... i miss penang a lot because i knew i have friends there... i dont know who to talk to.... i wish i could share this with someone, but who? nobody is here to listen, Endy. i have only you.... i mean, i only trusted you. sometimes, i just feel like i want to let this tears down, but i knew i can't. something is preventing it. something called promise. i know that i'm strong enough to go through this life. but sometimes i just need a break from this life. i need someone to hug me and tell me that it's ok to cry. if he's around, i dont mind crying because i know, there's someone to wipe my tears and tell me to stop crying.

i was in CL2 just now. i was trying to finish up on my proposal. i did few part of it, and it's only 40% done. i have to pass it up next Monday. i'm stuck. i cant type any of the proposal anymore. i have lots of idea on that project, but i just cant work today. i needed a break. Endy, will he call me on my birthday? i'm planning a party with my dudes on my birthday. i knew it's gonna be fun. my party is always fun. but i know that it's not what i want. i just want to celebrate it with the one i love the most. why Endy? why is it hard for me to delete him? i have lots of people waiting for me. am i a fool?

God, please help me going through this life. i need you to make me stand. please delete him from my life. i do miss him, a lot. if i were to choose, i'll choose him out of anything in this world. it's just stupid that we broke up. i'm a believer. i believe in you. i believe in us. and until today, i'm still waiting for an answer. i'm so confused. what did i do wrong? or you're just fooling around?

Endy, i dont have mood to type anymore... before i go, i wanna invite everybody to this event... check it out....

Hear the beats thumping? No? Strain your ears because the beats are coming closer! The anticipated 02 Days of Freedom will take place on 9 and 10 May at Admiral Marina, Port Dickson. DJs that need no introduction - Tiësto, Ferry Corsten and Cosmic Gate are slated to headline the festival. With two outdoor arenas, an onsite shopping village featuring bars, cafes and stalls, it’s one beach party where you can kick back and relax to some electronic dance music, or paint the beach red with some all-night dancing.

Tickets RM88 (presale, one day pass) RM153 (presale, two day pass). RM113 (door sale, one day pass) and available at Axcess outlets at Axcess Box Office 1 Utama, Rock Corner Midvalley, Axcess Office at Jalan Semangat and Tower Records, KLCC. For more info, call 03- 7711 5000 or visit www.axcess.com.my

hurt,
Tasha

Happy Valentine's Day

Time: 9:43 p.m.
Venue: Sunway Lagoon Perdana
Mood: Thrilled!
Condition: Healed!
Currently: Happy!

Endy,
first of all i wanna say a million sorry to you fro not updating this blog for a long time! i've been busy with life. i just came back from penang. i went back for CNY and unlucky me, i got dengue fever! i was at home for the whole week.. thank god there's one cute angel looking after me! he brought me my favourite flowers every day!

well, today is Valentine's Day and again, i have no date for today... well, except for Nick and H just now... hahahaha... i went out with Nick.. again, he bought me a beautiful bouquet of tulips... it's very beautiful.. i love it so much! thanks, dear! i know you tried your best to make me feel happy today. thanks for the ring too! it's such a symbolic ring for me! Endy, you wanna know what he wrote on the card? he says,

"Yes sweetheart, diamond is not forever,
but i still choose diamond because it shines throughout the year..."

for those who had read my old blog, they'll understand why he wrote this message! hehehe...

for H, yes i know you dont like to be revealed. that's why i'm just putting your initial here... and i knew that you read my blog, every single of them... so, i dont want to take the risk... hahahaha.... thanks for the lovely gift! but i just cant take it... it's too expensive.... keep it for your real sweetheart ok?? it's impossible for me to go for you! i just cant.... i'm waiting for somebody... i've given him 5 years.... and i'm gonna wait for him even though he doesnt want me anymore.... well, he might change his mind, right? whatever it is, i'm just gonna wait... hehhehe... thanks for the lovely dinner, H! i do adore you! you have style!! we're perfect, it's just that we're not in the perfect timing!

Nick,
i know you'll always be there for me. thanks for everything. today, i owe you one. frankly, i just cant resist that ring. i took it, not only because it's beautiful, but also because of the meaning behind it. how thoughfull of you for thinking of those beautiful moment and gift. you've never fail to make things special. i salute you for that. hehehe... Nick, give me some time, will you? i'll give you the answer sometime soon... i'm kinda sure of what i want right now... i feel extremely better! whatever it is, i know that i do love you... it's just that i love somebody else too! and you know exactly who that person is! i'll keep this ring with me just as it used to be...

to everyone,
happy valentine's day! i pray very hard everyday that nobody is gonna get my bad luck for love! i pray that everybody get what they want... until today, i could still remember of those sweet moment... believe it or not, i'm currently looking at his gift for valentine's that he gave last year.... i do love him, a lot!

i still love you,
and, i'll always do,
Tasha

New Sem

Time: 4:24 a.m.
Venue: MY room
Mood: ok ok
Condition: i dont know.. healed i guess!
Currently: listening to Westlife version of Total Eclipse of The Heart (man, i love that!)

Endy,
here i am, online once again. well, i cant talk much in my previous blog. dont ask me why. few reasons. too busy. no idea. no mood. mixed up feelings. well, you know me. i can be very self-confidence sometimes and at the other point, my misery life will show up. haha.. what a fool i am! frankly, i miss you. i miss talking to your for hours. i miss playing basketball with you. i miss crying in your arms. i wish i'm 10 once again. Endy Richter, i'll always miss you! the best friend i've ever have! ok, lets stop this drama! hehehe...

so, i've start my new semester. havent buy any book yet. my timetable sucks! 3 days of 8.30 class, one 9.30 class and one 10.30 class. however, i have 2 interesting lecturers for this semester. remember ms. kwong? i talk bout her before, did i? ok, whatever... eheheh.. i cant recall. she's a good lecturer. even though a bit slow. maybe it's because of the big class. or maybe it's just me. you know, i'm a very fast learner. the good thing is, she never notice that i slept in her class most of the time even though i sat in the first row! hehe.. well, what can i say botu Linux is... the more i learn the command, the more i realize i love Windows! haha... maybe i'll install Linux soon.. i mean, for educational purpose. i'm not gonna use it no matter what people say! hehe...

mr. dharmin is good too. i like his knowledge for computer. he eat and sleep with computer. well, as usual, girls always been underestimated in technical class. girls are so helpless. girls doesnt know how to different-shape between screwdriver and test pen. come on people, wake up! you're in the 20th century. we girls are not like the 60's anymore! what's so hard bout PC? yeah, i admit i'm not good in PC. but you can bet with me for kithen appliances. i bet most of the guys doesnt even know how to troubleshoot a fridge! well, i love mr. dharmin's class, except for those long lecture! hehe.. whatever it's... he's being understanding.. he always gave us 10 minutes break(even though we always tried to make it 15 minutes).

for ms. mohana's class, yeah, it's seriously boring. totally theory paper! and she elaborate too much too! i got assignment for this subject. it's a 100% coursework. i have to compile a multimedia implementation report as if i'm doing the real one. she ask us to form a group of minimum 2 maximum 4. well, i chooses to have less group member. this time, it's me and Choo Yen. you know her? she's my senior. she's in semester 6 now. again, we've been chuck into the same class just like semester 2. ms mohana had done the task breakdown and minimum requirement for her assignment. well, i'm being so organized and hardworking by dividing all the 9 task with Choo Yen while we're only required to pass up 1 and 2 next Friday. this is a good sign anyway. i'm showing interest in studies. well, not to condemn of praise anybody, but Choo Yen is an excellent student. i've seen her work. she's doing great. the most important thing of all is she does all of her responsibility. i'm happy to work with such person. at least i know i'm not the only one who are worried bout the assignment.

so, for this semester i'm targeting at least 2A and 1B. well, what's the B subject? PC Technical Support! it has exam! my biggest weakness! too many information to memorize! 50% exam. the other 50% is actually practical test. assembling PC. that's easy. i dont have to worry bout that. i'm worried bout the exam! what??? ok-ok!!!!!! dont show me such faces Endy. ok, i'll change my target. 3As for this sem. satisfied??? hehehe... i'll get it Endy. remember my new year resolution? i want to get at least 7As this year. i'll only have another 8 subject. so there's no space for any error! hehehe...

well, last semester i got 4As and 1D. surprisingly, right? yeah... i dont believe it either. i've send
an appeal letter to the director of examination with a support document from miss sophia. man, i love her! she gave me a great testimonial! oh ya... that D is for that Animation for Designer. well, you know her. Jaya hates me to the max! i dont know what's her problem. i really hate her too. she sucks! i've expected things will mess up between us. but i dont know it's gonna be this way. i know my project was good. i'll fight for it. what kinda designer am i if i cant even fight for my design?? i know i did all of my work. i deserve at least a B! but of course i want an A for that bitch's subject! i deserve 5As! i studied hard for E-Commerce and MySQL just to make my result looks nicer, and this fucked up easy subject is giving me a D? what the hell is going on? what's wrong with her?? have she lost her pussy? i really hate her! opps... sorry for cursing right here!

well... i tried a few company just now for my internship. i got a few feedback, which is a good feedback. they asked me to meet them with a proper resume and sample of my artwork. actually, my dream internship is Kid Chan Studio! he's a great photographer! but it's kinda impossible to get that right? i dont even major in photography. how is he gonna trust me? hehehe... another one is Blu Inc Media. well, this is more on graphic design. well, this is my major but i really love photography! Blu Inc is another big name. phew... i wish i could get that. you dont know what's Blu Inc? well, you know Female magazine? or Seventeen? it's from Blu Inc. i really loves the interface of the magazine. so creative! i'd love to learn from the designer!

Endy,
i think i should stop now. i wanna get some sleep. i wanna go to Subang Parade tomorrow. MPH sms me that there's a promotion for books there. wanna check out some books that i can buy. hehe... you know my passion towards book will never stop! i'll type to you again very soon. dont miss me too much ok? lova ya, pal!

Truth,
Tasha

50 ways to know if you're an Asian

Time: 3.14 p.m.
Venue: CLC, Sunway University
Mood: Bored

Endy,
phew... i just finish my E-commerce exam today... i was kidna pissed with the lecturer because she gave us nonsense questions... i spent the whole night studying 13 chapter of e-commerce and yet she dare to give me that kinda question??? can somebody please fuck her up??? hum... as u know... i've been busy lately with assignment and exam... i manage to finish up my flash animation on time and i'm done with MySQL... i'm just waiting to the exam on 12th... i cant wait to go back home!!! well... i read through few of my georgian blog just now... and i found one nice article bout Asian... ehehehe... so i just wanna share it with everybody!! enjoy reading it!! till next time ya!
1. You were/are a good student with very high GPAs.2. You majored in something practical like engineering, medicine or finance.3. You have more than one-college degree, especially more than one Master's.4. If you play a musical instrument, it must be piano.5. You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table.6. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.7. Your kitchen has a sticky film of grease over it.8. You beat eggs with chopsticks.9. You always leave outdoor shoes at the door.10. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack.11. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.12. You boil water before drinking.13. You eat all meals in the kitchen to keep your dining room clean.14. You don't use measuring cups when preparing foods.15. You save grocery bags and use them to hold garbage.16. You have a rice cooker.17. You're a wok user.18. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.19. You wash rice 2-3 times before cooking it.20. You make sounds when you have a bowl of soup.21. You don't dry-clean clothes, even if they need to be dry-cleaned.22. You iron your own shirts.23. You like congee with thousand year old eggs.24. You always cook yourself, even if you hate it.25. You use credit cards, and pay monthly bills in full.26. You do either soccer, swimming, badminton, volleyball, basketball, or ping pong, and have an obsession with making the Beijing Olympics.27. You buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.28. When you hand wash dishes, you only use cold water.29. You hate to waste food:a) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.b) You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.30. You don't own any real Tupperware-only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.32. When toilet paper is on sale, you buy 100 rolls and store them.33. You have a collection of miniature shampoo/conditioner bottles and little soap bars that you take every time you stay in a hotel.34. The condiments in your fridge are either Price Club sized or come in plastic packets, which you save every time you get take out or go to McDonald's.35. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (and travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes).36. You spit bones and other food scraps on the table.37. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself.38. When you go to a dance party, there is always a group of guys surrounding the dance floor trying to look cool.39. Your house/aparment is always cold in winter, and hot in summer.40. Your Mom drives her Mercedes to Foodtown, or Shoppers Food Warehouse regardless how far it is, even if the dairy is next door.41. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling Directory Assistance costs 50 cents.42. You only make long distance calls after 11pm or during weekends.43. You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached.44. You never call your parents just to say hi.45. You think ONLY Japanese can make good CARS!46. You use a colored face cloth every morning.47. You starve yourself before going to all-you-can-eat places.48. Almost all your money is in a savings account49. You never discuss your love life with your parents.50. You take this message and forward it to all your Asian friends. From 1 proud Asian to another, forward this to every damn Asian you know .i just did. will you? =D

busy,
Tasha

Don't get me wrong, people!

Time: 7:53 a.m.
Venue: still stuck here in my room!
Mood:
Condition: ok ok!
Currently: just finish checking myspace, friendster and myyearbook!

Endy,
heheh... i have something to tell you... remember my last post?? i have 3 three guys who says sorry to me... they assume that that blog was for them... well... not to make anybody embarrassed but i just cant stop smiling! hahaha... i think i should start typing some names whenever i wanna say out something... but i really dont like exposing people's name here... all of the name exposed here are with the permission of the person... i'll never write someone's name without permission... that's just inane!

anyway, that guy that i dedicated the blog to actually message me in YM yesterday night... he says sorry to me... i said i'm cool with it.. it's not that i'm sad or anything... it's just that i regret for not making first step... well... he did gave me a hint!ok whatever now... lets focus on the next step of being the successful tasha... ignore those junks!

well... before i start my blog... i really hope whatever that i write here wont make anyone think i'm talking bout him or her.... well... it wont harm you if you ask me or anything... but i think you should know yourself better right?

hurm.... what did i do yesterday?? hurm... as i told you, i'm going to college to meet Ms. Vani for consultation hours. i reach college around 11.35 a.m. i called Navdeep and we met at cafe... he told me that Ms. Vani is not there! yes! she's absent! WTF! i woke up early on friday just to meet her and yet she's absent! the best thing is she have my number! cant she like call/sms me or something??? wasted my time!!! if i knew that she's gonna be absent, i'll take my own sweet time getting ready to go out!

so, i went for lunch with Navdeep at Taj and then he sent me home... after that i hang around at home for a while, go online while waiting for Kenneth to come back... i was suppose to meet him around 5... but patheticly, i fell asleep! he called me, and yet i slept again... after that, around 7, Khalid called me... he's on his way to Pyramid! i got up, settle few important things and i reach there around 7.35 p.m. poor him waiting for me! I'm sorry Khalid! i'm really am sorry! anyway, we went to my beloved Old Town coffee house... hehehe... i ordered my fav. Hazelnut White Coffee! he ordered the same thing too! then we hang around at our smoking area in Pyramid, waiting for Emi to come... next, we headed to my most fav. place in Subang, Asia Cafe! hahahahahahha.... we played pool for about 4 hours.... i won Luke, Emi, Amelia and Khalid's cousin who's so called BlingBling! hahahahaha... but sadly, i lost the last frame with Luke! i really need to practice more! i've been abandoning pool for quite a while... been busy with shopping for the past few weeks until i dont really have time to go for pool! hhehehehe...

hurm... what's my plan for today? well, i'm fully booked until next friday! hahaha...i promise Kenneth that i'm gonna watch movie with him today... i really have to made up this time because i've made him wait for me for 2 times! i'm sorry! so, today is movie day! hehehe... tomorrow, i'll be attending my aunt's open house... i'm gonna bring few people... Monday i'll be busy doing my Sounscape assignment... so the assignment already book me! Tuesday i'm going to be busy with LAN assignment presentation... i have to pass it up! Wednesday, i'm going out for a movie again with someone... and Thursday i'm going to watch movie with Navdeep as we dont have Database class on Thursday... remember those horror replacement class??? phew... hahaha... Friday i'll be meeting one of my online friends from KL... and finally, Saturday.. i'm free! hahaha... so anybody wanna go out or anything? just call me ok... opppss... i dont anybody... i mean... anybody that i know... or at least anybody that i talk to in Myspace, YM or MSN... hehehe....

ok Endy.... i'll continue next time... maybe not tonight... i wont even be home tonight... i'll be staying over at my friend's place... i'll see you maybe tomorrow morning or night... if i'm not too busy with assignment... ok?? have a sweet day Endy... may god bless you with everything... i really miss our sweet moment together when we were young... remember those silly days in primary school?? hehehehe... oh ya... almost forgot! Nick is coming tomorrow!! Yay!!!! hehe... ok Endy... gtg... bye!

busy lil girl,
Natasha

He's Taken

Time: 5.37 a.m.
Venue: My room
Mood: Sad? Frustrated!
Condition: Tired!
Currently: Regreting for nto confessing my feeling towards him!

Endy,
remember the guy that i have a crush on? well... not that sunway student... he's still with me... i'm talking bout that guy who stay in KL... still.. can't pronounce his name here as he's also frequent reader... hurm... he gave me a hint yesterday... that he's gonna choose someone to be his special girl... and i know that i'm in his final two list!!! the chances are 50%-50%! and how stupid am i of ignoring that chances thinking that he's gonna choose me! i should've make some move! actually the chances are already 65%-35%! 65% for me, and 35% for that hot arabian chick of his! damn it! why on earth did i ignore that?????? am i over confident that he's gonna be mine?? or maybe it's just my pride that stop me from making some move! he tell me that that girl gave him some hint on moving to the next level of relationship! damn it! i really likes him! i really hope that he'll choose me and i'm quite sure yesterday that i already won him! god damn it she won! fuck man! Tasha, you gotta realize that you're ugly! next time make some move! i was smiling on webcam yesterday when he said that that girl wanted to be with him... he said he's still thinking over it... and i'm confident that he's gonna reject her! how stupid am i, Endy?? damn, he's gorgeous! i should've lower down my ego and tackle him or ask him out!!! omg!!! i really regret!! i tried my best to be close with him using my character... and he likes me as me! that's great! all of my effort for the past 1 month are useless now!

ok, let's forget bout him.... instead of thinking of that, i better think of how to get the other one! hehehe... well, that Sunway guy... this one i'm 100% confident that he's mine... hehehe... hey... tasha... stop talking bout guys!!!! haha... ok now let me tell you what happen today... opps... maybe it's more like yesterday! hahaha... it's friday today.... so yesterday.... i have full package of class!! from 8.30 a.m. to 5.30 p.m. with only 1 hour break at 12.30 p.m. hurm... ok here's the breakdown...

8.30 a.m. to 10.30 a.m.
Animation for Designer - Ms. Jaya
learn bout the button..

10.30 a.m. to 11.30 a.m.
Audio Production - Ms. Sara
discussing on final assesment, the radio drama which consist of 60% marks!

11.30 a.m. to 12.30 p.m.
E-Commerce -Ms. Lim
group discussion on Consumer Behaviour(ok this one is just a 1 hour of crap!)

12.30 p.m. - 1.30 p.m.
Lunch at Medan
with Emi and Vish

1.30 p.m. - 5.30 p.m.
Database - Ms. Vani
1 hour of boring lecture which i came in 15 minutes late and 3 hours of practical, doing the SELECT command... 21 questions took me almost 2 hours to finish, well, including surfing the net and chit chatting with Navdeep... hehe...

5.30 p.m.
finally get out from college!

hehehe... so, did u see how hectic my timetable is today??? well... i went to all of it!! surprisingly huh?? all 7 or the DMM folks went to class today! except for Raymond who didnt come to morning class! hehehe... that bugger!!! i went to pyramid straight after class... i wanted to buy a pair of jeans... and until today still cant find anything i like!! i wanted to buy from Googles... went there this evening and all they have are 2 designs that i already bought... tomorrow i'll go to Subang Parade with Emi... maybe Soda have nice jeans... hehee... maybe i'll get myself another shade of nail color too... oh ya... i have to get my brown shimmer blusher from Elianto... i love it!

i'm going to college today for consultation hour with Ms. Vani... well, it's not compulsory but i think i need it since i'm kinda confuse with that Database! i'm okay with the ERD and EERD concept, but i'm blurr of how to apply it through the assumption! as for practical... haha... u know me... i have no problem when it comes to practical... it's superb... then maybe me and Navdeep will go somewhere and watch movie... it's been a while since the last time i watch movie... the last one was with my girls, watching Resident Evil, right before i went back to Penang...

i woke up at 4 just now... now i cant sleep.... heehe... i really dunno what to do anymore... i'm trying to sleep now!!! oh... i almost forgot... i was kinda pissed today with my marks... i mean my radio advertisement marks... well, even though i got 2nd highest in class, i'm still not satisfy with it! she gave me 17.6% over 20 while i think i could at least get 18%! Melita is the highest with the mark 18.6%! i do believe that i could've got better... well, Melita deserve higher mark too!! she did well! and the best thing is... she gave Yong 10/10 for the same assignment!! well, he's in the other subject but they did learn a bit of audio... he had the same assignment... and she gave him full marks!! wtf!!!

ok, lets forget bout that... so, my plan for today is to go to college, then out with Navdeep, then out with Emi and Khalid later at night... tomorrow i'll go out with Kenneth and on Sunday i'll play pool... wtf? where's the study part?? none? Tasha, tasha! when are you gonna change?? my E-Commerce exam is on 3rd December and my Database is on 12th December... i guess i wont go back to Penang this year! well, good for me too because i think i wanna spend some time with Kenneth before he leave Malaysia.... he'll be going to Canada to pursue his second year of degree... i'm gonna miss him a lot!! a great companion! i feel sorry for him... i'm hurting him too much with my attitude of living with past... he's always there to listen to me!! i do appreciate that! i envy your patience towards me...

Endy, will you excuse me now? i wanna get ready for today... i have to polish my nails! can you imagine me going to college with my nail unpolish! yes, i did that yesterday! omg!!! so... i have to polish it today before going to college... i'll see you next time ok... i might not write tonight as i'll be home late... ok endy.. bye!

I still miss him,
Natasha

Time: 8.31 a.m.
Venue: Multimedia Production Lab, Sunway University College!
Mood: Blurr + Happy + Excited
Condition: ok ok i think..
Currently: Waiting for Animation class...

Endy,
hehe... sorry for not writing yesterday night... i was busy with few things... i'm going to pyramid later to buy few pair of jeans... hehehe... my final shopping and then i'm done... enough of shopping... i'm sick of it... it's frustrating finding for things that u like... today is the first day i come to class after so long... i kinda miss class... hehe... i cant type much... i'll continue at home later... bye...

sleepy,
tasha

Memories versus hates!

Time: 9:45 a.m.
Venue: My room
Mood: Pissed? Sad? only god knows...
Condition: Seriously... i dont know!
Currently: Thinking and reminiscing every single memories!

Endy,
phew... first of all... sorry for not updating here for a longggggggg time... i was seriously busy... i woke up early today... i came back from penang yesterday night.... then went to AC with Emi... hurm... she told me few things.... one of the thing is... Imran is coming to Malaysia... well... to meet his girlfriend here in Malaysia... one thing that i'm not satisfied with.... he told her that he's gonna explain everything to me in front of his girlfriend... well... you tell me! what's his point anyway? between us, there's a big gap and it's over... i knew that... i have a clear picture of that... no point of you explaining... IN FRONT OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND.... she dont even know me anyway... i have my own life now... do i ever disturb you, Imran? no right? so.... why dont you leave me alone... i never question you anything after that message i sent...

New chapter in my life have yet to get started... i'm happy with what i have now... yes... i'm still stuck with memories... but that doesnt give anyone the right to fool around with me... dont mess with me... i'm just the real Tasha once again... let's get real... face the world realisticly... after all this while, we never heard anything from him... no messages, no contact... nothing... well... i dont stop anyone from being with him... Emi told me that they're gonna meet him once he's here... well girls... dont feel hesitate to go... he's your friend anyway... no harm of meeting friends.... just dont mention anything bout me in front of him... he's having a beautiful life now... and that's what i want... i dont keep any bad memories with him... so, i do think that he deserve the best for his life... i've told you girls that i value nothing in his life... that's not his fault anyway... i'm the one who's stupid that can't read that from the beginning.... i should've read that earlier.... Endy, how stupid am i for not realizing the fact that i value nothing??? Nick was right... nobody could ever love me as much as he did... i could dare me with that... and yes... i could see that now... a very caring gentleman... yet a great friend! i've never met a person who cares that much about me, even after i broke up with him... i do respect you for that, Nick... not much people will have that kinda respect from me....

actually, i have so much to tell you... of what happen during the holiday which i enjoy to the max! then about my feelings and daily life.... well... today... my class start at 1.30... so i have plenty of time to get ready and all... right now... i just wanna sit down and think bout everything carefully... i chat with James yesterday night... he sound quite upset with my decision... i still can't accept him... i never did... he's a nice guy... but he's just not there in my heart.... he went offline all of the sudden... maybe he was mad at me... yeah... my mistake... i hurt someone!! that's bad! i know how it feel to be left behind... i'm so sorry James... i'm really am... i know i'm useless... to live my life everyday by reminiscing memories... i'm just stuck with my past... that's what i'm trying to fix right now... i'm living with memories and i hate it...

well... i have one good news for you and me.... i have a crush with this one guy... well... cant tell who because he's one of my frequent reader... hahahaa.... maybe i'll tell you once we're official... we're kinda dating each other... the best thing bout him is... he's exactly like me... he dont care if i have 100 guys with me of whatever... he said that he believe in competition... sounds familiar to you? yeah... that's me... i dont care if that guy have 100 girls... i do believe in competition... anyway... remember my favourite quote? if you love something, set it free... if it comes back, it's yours... if not, it was not meant to be... hehe... but i believe he's mine! hahahaahahaha.... there's no competition! oppss... Tasha is back right? with her high level of confidence! hahaha... phew... i miss myself! 70% of me are back... just need to pull the other 30%! i miss the old me... now, there's no such thing as loyalty... hehe.. well, it's ok if he wanted to be loyal to me... hehe...

hurm... another guy was upset yesterday night.... i was suppose to have a date with him... he had been planning and waiting for the date since last week... i cancelled it yesterday and he sounds mad... i'm sorry... i just dont have the mood to flirt... haha... i played pool for 2 hours yesterday... it was quite fun after 2 weeks of not playing... my game are miserable yesterday... haahhaha.... well... i wasn't concentrating anyway... i was busy checking out this guy... he's hot but too bad... he have a girl with him... haha... well... checking out doesnt give me any harm right??? hahahaha....

oh... i almost forgot... well... how can i forget one of the most important thing??? i perm my hair 2 days before raya... hahaha... i love it! and i change my style now... i dont know how many time do i wanna change my style... and i dont know how long this style gonna last! haha... well... nothing much... i just decided to wear jeans once again.... yes... i mean long pair of jeans.... i look totally different... hahaha... i changes everyone's perspective on me... but still... none of my habit and attitude change! hahahaha.... i might look nice... but i'm still the old TyrantTsarTash! so, dont mess with me... and my man! hahahaha... what's wrong with me today? i thought i was feeling whimsical bout my life just now???? ah... forget it... have a great day today, Tasha!!! go through another phase of life happily... never turn back!

Endy... give me 10 minutes break.... i'll continue later... i have to answer this phone call! hehehe... it's Nick...

hey... sorry... hehehehe... he says hi! i miss him... he's going back to California next week! i called him yesterday... he was drunk when i called him... hahaha... i requested him to stay with me this week... spend time together... then he said he's too dizzy to concentrate on what i'm saying... he said he'll call me once he woke up... and yes he did! hehehehe...Endy... it's almost 11... i'll see you later ok... i have to get ready for class... wanna take my time today!byee...

I still love him,
Natasha Farhana Leow